A Change for the Philadelphia Phillies
April 18, 2007: Philadelphia, PA---The Fighting Phils today made a change from Good Ole Charlie Manuel to Joe Cookie DiBello as manager of this year's team of under-achievers. Charlie Manuel and the Phil's were knocked around again by the Met's and the Phillies top brass thought it was time for a change given their poor early record. Pat Gillick the General manager for the Phil's said, "Shit, I don't expect to live forever and these April swoons aren't acceptable. Cookie DiBello was available now and we think he has what it takes to jump-start these over-paid underachievers".
Joe Cookie DiBello is new to the major leagues but well known in baseball ,government and business circles. Recently recognized by Harvard University's annual search for innovations, and named after former Phillie Cookie Rojas, DiBello brings the best of the past and the future to the managers job. DiBello's work reinventing the federal government, and his baseball experience, was the reason Gillick picked the Ardmore, PA native. Gillick said, "Hey, Cookie has been wrestling with federal workers and their partners for decades and he has made underachievers excel. If he can help an organization as screwed up as the National Park Service we think he can do the same job for us".DiBello has played amateur baseball and softball for over 40 years. Like his namesake, Cookie has played all fielding positions and was a threat with the bat. He regularly anchored successful teams in and around Ardmore and was often seen giving his son Michael baseball tips that helped his boy play college ball and try-out for major league teams.
When asked about his father's expertise Michael said, "He still has some pop in his bat and some strategies in his head. He is a bit out of the Joe Torre-style of management. Besides the Phillies are terrible--again. They are luck to get him".When contacted at his home in Ardmore Cookie said, "I could use a change from these knotheads at 3rd Street and another new challenge. I know a good deal about ineffective organizations, baseball and parks and I think the combination of my experiences makes me well suited to lead the Phillies. God only knows I couldn't do any worse than Charlie Manuel".DiBello wouldn't speculate on who he might bring along with him to coach the Phils but it won't be surprising to see a skirt or two in his staff by the 4th of July. Either way Cookie promises that the view of the Phils will be better by then.
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