A Resolution to Honor a Couple of Blaguards

A Resolution to Honor a Couple of Blaguards

April 16, 2001

Whereas, with a lack of program and office leadership they have done many, many good things with little money and less good judgment over a period of more than twenty years.

Whereas, they were unfortunate enough to make bad career decisions and enter the federal workforce at an early age and were not able to secure employment elsewhere in later years.

Whereas, they possess a disregard for the traditional conduct of federal government agencies in the area of park and resource planning and continually strive to achieve the coveted “anti-fed-fed” status.

Whereas, they have withstood attempts to implode their career including Reductions-In-Force, Inspector General investigations, bad furniture, temporary staffs, zero funding, bribes and threats by the Directorate, bad air, regular humbles, reorganization, disorganization, Mike Gordon, Sandy Rosencrans, and others.

Whereas, they were able to figure out that although management owns the office, furniture, budget, equipment, salary, and most everything else, the work does in fact belong to each of us and we alone decide how it gets done.

Whereas, that it is normally the appropriate federal policy to forget the past and the achievements of others, and only recognize the activities that are directly attributable to you or to those in positions of power, this comes as an after-thought-of-modest-intent.

Now, therefore, we the leadership of the Rivers, Trails & Conservation Assistance Program proclaim Monday April 16, 2001 as "Include Me Out Day" and hereby recognize Joseph DiBello and Joseph Eugster as "A Couple of Blaguards".  Specifically we agree to recognize them for whatever they have done; provide such recognition in an obtuse manner so as not to be clear, concise or tangible; neither deny or confirm this recognition with any written materials; supply disingenuous smiles and brief remarks; and provide them the opportunity to accept this recognition only if they are willing to pay their way to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.